BEGGININGS (Ljubljana, 2006)
It has all started on a sunny day, 16 years ago, in the center of Ljubljana. More specifically, on Preseren square, where the monument of the greatest Slovenian poet France Presern is, just besides biggest symbolys of Ljubljana, River Ljubljanica and Triple-bridge – the bridge designed in 1929 by our greatest architect, Joze Plecnik. It was spring. At that time, I was 22. The streets of our capital were full of joy. People, wearing light clothing, were rushing after daily activities or just relaxing, talking, enjoying the sun having a favorite coffee and a snack. My sister and I were heading through the city center. As we walked towards the square, a tall, beautiful and charismatic young girl, our age, crossed our way and stopped us. Together with her, there were two or three of them more, all unique in appearance and noticeable from afar. Each of them held a folder and a pen in their hands. Whether it’s a survey or a sale, we thought and were already looking for an excuse to avoid it politely and going our way. To the great surprise of both, the girl did not survey nor sell, but asked directly, if we would be interested in modeling work, saying we have all the attributes a model needs. At first, thinking it was some kind of joke, we couldn’t believe the question was really meant for us. But it wasn’t a joke, it was an real offer from a serious and credible modeling agency called Hering Models & Promotion and the girls, who were looking for new talents, were its already established models. When talking about myself, I’ve been more reserved and shy in nature, and self-confidence has never been my virtue, qualities which aren’t exactly model references, so I didn’t think about modeling, even in my wildest dreams not. My sister and I responded kindly, thanked her and said goodbye, saying we would consider it. Before we went separate ways, one of the girls handed us a piece of paper and a pen to share our information, name and number. We did so and said goodbye. In the next few days, we received a text message on our mobile phone, an invitation to a more detailed presentation at the agency’s address. At first, I was not the most in favor of this idea, but when challenged that day, and when I noticed this might indeed be actually possible, I began to think more and more about this opportunity. Deep down my curiosity began to erode. I started to wonder, what would it be like, if this become a reality. An inner voice has spoked – I have to try!
After browsing the Internet, Hering models & Promotion, together with Bronz and Model Group agencies, was one of the best agencies in Slovenia, whose idea leader was, quite controversially, Stane Hering. Now, more than fifteen years of working in this field, I can definitely say that the agency was the most professional at the time, and the payment to the models for the work done was the highest.
Me still indecisive, my sister and I attended a presentation at the agency’s address, in one of the buildings of the former tobacco factory in Ljubljana. The tobacco factory was founded in 1871 and was considered the third largest tobacco processing company in Europe. My sister was determined from the very beginning, she is not interested in modeling and she was there with me only as a support. The presentation was led by Stane Hering himself, a man in the 50’s, with a strong charisma and presence and a very special, a bit rocker, style, with long hair tied in a ponytail and a long beard. He was really very convincing. The path to becoming a model in his agency, however, was not so easy and not so cheap. At the presentation, Stane let us know that this agency is only for the most serious and best models, and that expectations are high. To prove how strongly you want to become their represented model, you first had to take a 16-hour walking and posing course and do a photoshoot for your first portfolio (“book”). The price for the walking and posing course was approx. 150 euros, for the photoshoot with a professional photographer and a book, together with eight A3 images, an additional approx. 100 euros. As a student, back then, 250 euros was too much of a bite and too much of a risk. I gave up the thought of becoming a model. At home, of course, the conversation soon shifted to this topic. Dad immediately expressed his opinion. He was not in favor of all this “modeling thing” and distanced himself from it, saying: “I have said my part, and you, from now on, do what you want”. After that, he was no longer part of the debate. Since then, my sister – who was encouraging me from the beginning that I need to try – and I secretly negotiated only with mom. I remember how hard it was for us to tell the price they were asking, knowing, mom would have a hard time agreeing to it. But mom, who is a bit of a gambler, like me, said: “It’s a lot of money, but if you really want to try, I will lend you the money – only, if you return it, when you get your first job. We’ve already thrown away so much money for nonsense, so why not spend it on this too.”
With mom’s support, the decision was made – let’s give it a shot. This was a little secret between the three of us. Not even my best friends knew, what I was getting myself into. I kept it to myself. I did not confide this to anyone, as I was somehow convinced that modeling was something controversial, something that was far from my beliefs and the beliefs of my society I hung out with, and something that no one who knows me, would attribute to me. All the model activities I did later – such as castings and jobs – I was successfully hiding from others, except from my family. I haven’t hung this on a “big bell” for a long, long time. Only, when number of modeling jobs started to get bigger and when friends and others began to see me in TV commercials, TV shows, and in pictures from various events – published in newspapers, portals, and social medias – then I slowly started to run out of excuses for, where I was and what I was doing. At first, despite the positive responses among friends and acquaintances, I was ashamed of my accomplishments. When the conversation turned to modeling, I didn’t like to talk about it and tried to take the conversation to something else. But, over the years, I’ve outgrown this as well. There was no more hiding and I was proud of all the jobs I was able to get as a model.
MODELING COURSE AND FIRST PHOTOSHOOT
The modeling course “walking and posing” was not as simple as many people would think, including me. On the contrary, it was a 16-hour course, very professionally organized and led, under the guidance and mentorship of Stane Hering himself. Stane was a strict and demanding teacher, with many experiences and knowledge, very hardworking and always full of energy. Because of all the knowledge and effort he put in, he expected the same attitude from us as well. The course took place in the basement of the dance studio in the Zelena jama district in Ljubljana, and lasted four days in a row for four effective hours a day. We started every day very early in the morning, at 7 in the morning. There were about 10 of us beginners, most of them of course women. Mirrors were installed on all sides of the studio, with the help of which, we learned to pose, change facial expressions and practice posture and walking. Stane himself demonstrated everything, including women’s walking. Stane, despite his professional attitude, was a lot of fun at the same time, so laughter and positivism were never lacking. Along with the music, we practiced and built on our self-confidence for hours. We, more shy ones, took longer to relax completely, others less so. And we practiced and practiced, with many repetitions of solo and group walking, turns, posing (with or without a jacket), knowing how to walk according to the music, different facial expressions, etc. At the end of the course, we staged a show, when everyone had to show the learned elements and choreography individually. As strange as it may sound, I took a lot from the course, not only what is related to modeling, but also about life itself, especially how to be more confident, how to trust in yourself more and how to perform in front of others.
After completing the course, we (beginners) have to go through two more phases, before becoming a represented model by the Hering agency – a photoshoot for model’s first portfolio and, at the end, a test (performance) of walking and posing. Stane is also a photographer, which meant, photoshoot was also in his domain. A true “multitasker” he was, what to write more. A few weeks after the course, on a beautiful late spring morning, I had my very first photoshoot. Stane ordered me to bring black shoes, a belt and jeans, and he, with his team of stylists and make-up artists, will take care of everything else. The stylist chose two looks for me, on which she thought, in combination with clothes I brought, suited me best. The third look was intended only for photoshoot in underwear. The location of the shoot was old Tobacna (a former tobacco factory) with its surroundings. Yes, correct, exactly where the agency’s office was also located. A team of artists did make-up for me, the first in my life, and fixed my hair. We were ready. I have never stood in front of a camera with such a large lens before. Even all the lenses of my aunt – who is an amateur photographer and who often likes to take photos of our family – are smaller. Stane was giving me instructions on how to behave and pose in front of the camera. From the very awkward first few minutes, I was getting more and more relaxed. Stane, at the same time, was getting more pleased with what he saw through the camera lens. In and around old Tobacna there were many elements and objects with a touch of the old, and as such, Tobacna was very suitable for capturing more artistic pictures. We chose a few different locations and took some shots at each one.
The photoshoot went fast. To called it “a wrap”, took us two hours or so. When finished, I didn’t know what the final result will be and what to expect, once images will be selected, retouched and finally placed on photo paper. Stane seemed to be pleased how the shooting went, saying he got, what he wanted.
LAST STEP
As a conclusion – before becoming a represented model of the Hering models agency – there was a last performance needed, this time in front of the “jury”. We all, who participated on a course, gathered together at the agency’s address. Stane and four professional models of his agency were the ones, who assessed our performances. The task was simple: to make it work, you had to show a proper walking and posing, learned before, and receive at least 3 positive feedbacks from 5 of them. Stane was great at building psychic momentum, and with his extremely professional attitude at the same time, he made us feel as it was a real fashion show. There was a sense of nervousness among each of us new models. Before it has all started, we practiced the last steps and poses in the hallway outside the room, where the agency was. Stane and the other four sat in the room. We were quiet, walking up and down, and all that could be heard was the pounding of shoes on the ground and the creaking of the old, worn parquet of Tobacna.
For the male models, the performance required two walks, from the beginning to the end of the room, with two poses in front of the “jury”. The first walk and pose was with a jacket on. Secondly, I needed to take off the jacket, hand it over the arm and finish the walk back. When walking, I had to pay attention to several elements: a straight back, a strong and faster step, swinging arms by sliding palms along the thighs, and a confident, striking, one-point look. They called us into the room one by one. I performed fairly sovereignly. A few days later, I learned via post mail, I had passed and received 5 out of 5.
At last, I got a modeling book with eight photos in it. I officially became the new face of the Hering models agency. Still today, for all the pictures and videos I get from the shootings, I first ask my family members for an opinion. They are my most credible and honest critic and their opinion means everything to me. Even then, 16 years ago, it was no different. When I picked up the book at the agency, I waited all the way home and showed it to my mom and sister first, before I even opened it myself. I waited for their response. Considering that this was my first real photoshoot, they were thrilled with what they saw. Only then – after I got their response, I allowed myself to review the photos too (*you can see some photos from the book in the first image above).
That’s how it all started…
FIRST CASTING WITH INJURY
It didn’t take long for Stane to call me to the first casting, which took place at the agency. Before the casting, there was a large number of models in the hallway, female and male, all of completely different types, but all tall and slender figures. Among them, I knew only a few of those, with whom I took the course together, and who came to try their luck, just like me. Most of the models were dressed in black tight-fitting clothes to emphasize their body proportions as best they could. I wore loose jeans and a bright red Tom Taylor V-neck, tight-fitting T-shirt. My outfit wasn’t exactly by standards. I just put on, what I found best in the closet and what I thought it can be fashionable enough. Just before casting started, almost all the models practiced walking in the hallway. One less intense, the other more, depending on experience and attitude. It has begun. The casting was for big DIOR event. As before, we were called by name to the room, but this time the “jury” was replaced by real clients. At the end of the room, behind a table, sat three people. At that time, of course, I did not know all their work and references. Among the three was Saso Radovic, then the “guru” of fashion in Slovenia.
Being a total beginner at such a big casting has already been a big enough challenge for me, but… To help me remember my first casting even more, was the fact, I attended it with a cast on my hand. The cast reached almost all the way to the elbow. How did this happen?! Few days before the casting,I got injured during basketball training. The ball flew directly into my outstretched little finger and dislocated it. The coach immediately bravely adjusted the finger back, but later the bandage and splint were unfortunately not enough. After the examination, the doctor decided on a cast, 4 weeks of it.
Once all the models were done with the casting, we had to wait outside the room for the final decision. After a few minutes of waiting, I, to my big surprise, heard my name, when Stane called me back into the room. Besides me, only two male models were called, one already very established model, Radovan Jokanovic, the first male face of the agency. The main decision-maker and organizer of the whole event, the aforementioned, Saso Radovic, asked me, without any hesitation, whether the cast would be removed before the event and stated the date! In that moment, I knew right away, the event is happening before my appointment at the doctor. I was aware, a negative answer means a lost opportunity, and someone else would be chosen instead of me. I automatically answered: “Yes, it will”. I was confirmed for the job. There was no way back anymore and there was only one thing for me to do – just before the event, I removed the cast myself at home with the help of scissors and a scalpel. The next day, I successfully performed at the event.
FIRST MODELING JOB
Today, after almost 16 years, I vividly remember that late summer day and my first job as a model, as vividly as it would have been yesterday. Dior’s event, where the new Dior Rouge lipstick was promoted, took place at the National Museum of Slovenia in Ljubljana. Preparations for the event began in the morning, about 10 hours before the main evening event. We were three male models, me, Radovan and Jernej, and one female model, Tjasa, who did not show up so early. While the rest of the staff worked to get the catering, lights, sound system and stage ready in time – we, models , first went to a dress rehearsal. After that, the main organizer Saso Radovic explained to us, how the event will look like and what our task is. We did a quick rehearsal on the stage and went to make up and hair. Part of the outfit was a white shirt, black pants, black elegant shoes, a bow tie, sunglasses and a camera. Overall, it was a very classic and elegant look. With big, black, Dior sunglasses, all freshly shaved and with a “side parting” hairstyle, we were like from the 1960s. The task of us, male models, was to be cool, to walk slowly among the guests in the spacious lobby of the museum and, with the camera in our hands, pretend to be taking pictures of some of them. The main protagonist of the event – a very well-known model, also globally – Tjasa Stanic, arrived just before the main rehearsal, about 3 hours before the event. Once she was ready and dressed up, we made the main and last rehearsal together and waited in the backstage for the final performance. Lights, music, stage… everything was in place. It has begun. Many nicely dressed people were already present in the hall of the museum, among them many Slovenian entertainers, whom I had previously only seen on television or in newspapers. Nervousness was definitely present. Due to the strong headlights and the large number of people present, it was getting hotter and hotter in there. When we heard the right beat of the music, which marked the beginning of the show, all three men stepped out of the backstage, first posed motionless in front of the visitors for a while, and then started walking among the people. Tjasa, as the main protagonist of the event, owned the central object – it was a specially designed divan with a slender steel construction and soft silk cushions. Tjasa was lying on the divan, while red rose petals were falling on her. She was under a strong beam of headlights and surrounded by mirrors, so the scene was mirrored on several sides. Tjasa – with her hair tied back, wearing bright red Dior lipstick and a long, black couture dress – looked very avantgarde. With elegant, slightly seductive movements, she posed in front of the audience, media and photographers. She acted as one of the mermaids, the mermaids from Homer’s Odyssey, who with appealing gestures and singing wanted to lure the sailors in the wrong direction and destroy them. At least that’s the impression I got. The hall was discreetly lit in red. I started a little nervous. Because of the heat I felt and the breathing, my dark, sunglasses misted over. The ambiance in the hall was dark, so, at first, I didn’t see properly where to go. Luckily, the lights, by the walls, were strong enough, so I could see where to move, without falling or bumping into anyone. Of course, I couldn’t fix my glasses, as it would look unprofessionally. I slowly got used to conditions and became more confident.
As the atmosphere became more and more relaxed, the guests started taking pictures of/with us. There were also photographers and journalists from various media houses. The flashes, the spotlights, the loud music, all that ambience and the four of us in the spotlight, was something unforgettable. For the first time in my life, I felt like a star. When the show ended, I couldn’t believe what had happened to me. I certainly didn’t expect the event to be so big and glamorous. As a complete beginner, I performed alongside the established model, Tjasa Stanic, and in front of a large crowd of visitors, which was something completely unimaginable for me at the time. Being able to take part in such event, does not happen every day and not everyone is able to experience it. I did it. I didn’t make a mistake. We all did it. Later, seeing the satisfaction on the face of the main organizer Saso, I felt immense joy and pride. His happiness meant a lot to me, as I knew how much work he, and the rest of the team, put into. I stayed for a champagne and canapé and spoke a few words with participants and visitors. I exchanged some contacts and slowly made my way home. I thanked all the organizers for the opportunity and before I rode the bike and set off, Saso, as a reward for a job well done, gave me a small bag with a Dior Rouge lipstick in it. A real, total new Dior lipstick! As if I had received gold, I rode home excitedly and with only one thought and wish – to give it to my sister and to surprise her with something, which she probably would never have afforded for herself. Without my sister this unique experience would never have happened to me.
CONCLUSION AND DOCTOR’S RESPONSE
So, quite unexpectedly, I started to like the world of fashion, which has given me so much over the years. Modeling allowed me to meet a range of exceptional, talented, interesting people, artists and new friends from all over the world. I visited places, I would not have otherwise and experienced many unforgettable moments.
At the doctor, a few days after the event, I was discharged quickly. When the doctor went through the diagnosis, he had written four weeks ago, and saw that I was already without a cast without his consent, he was a little upset and angry. Despite the apology and the excuse, that the cast was already too damaged to serve its function, he did not want to hear it. Which is perfectly understandable. What I did was wrong and not respectful towards him. When asked, if the little finger was healed, he answered shortly: “You are an expert, you know better than me”. My eximination was over and the treatment as well. I thanked doctor anyways, apologized again, said goodbye and went home.
*written during the lockdown and posted on 18th day, since between four walls (Sanghai, China)